I didn’t realize how lucky I was: Getting Stalked in Montana
This last weekend, I spent quite a bit of time watching, "I am a Stalker" on Netflix. I have to be honest, it kind of gave me a bit of an anxiety attack, but I couldn't quit watching.
I've been stalked
One of my scarier stalkers was right here in Great Falls. It was in the late 80's. I did nights on an AM Country station, 13 KEIN. It was my first on-air job and I worked 6 to midnight. We were on 2nd Avenue North and the control room had an enormous picture window. For months, I want to say close to a year, I had a man call me numerous times a night. He would often comment on what I was wearing at work, ask me insanely personal questions or say very inappropriate things, and he was convinced he was the one for me and if I'd just give him a chance we'd be happy forever. Other nights, he'd scream obscenities over the phone, he'd threaten violence and he said he'd get me fired for being a whore. It was one or the other, usually both, every single night.
In those days, we had no caller ID, and it was required that the announcers answer the phone at all times. When I told my bosses, it was shooed off as a super fan, and that it only happened to the pretty girls on the air. I should feel good about it, in some way.
One night, I was walking home, I lived in the Cloud 9 apartments. I got about 1/2 a block from the station, and a car pulls up to me with the passenger window rolled down. The guy asked me if he could give me a ride. I instantly recognized his voice, I leaned over to tell him no, and I saw a very large knife on the passenger seat. I have never run so fast in my life. I went right back to the radio station and spent the night.
When I went home the next morning, he was parked OUTSIDE MY APARTMENT. I called the police, and they told me until he attacked me there was nothing they could do. HE STAYED THERE 3 DAYS.
I moved to Billings shortly after that, and I never heard from him again. Until this weekend, I never knew how lucky I was that he lost his hankering for me.
The stalkers had NO REMORSE
Of all the stalkers featured on the Netflix show, ONE showed remorse for what they had done. ONE. The rest talked about how they know now that they're in jail, that they were stalking. Most of them talk about how it was all a misunderstanding, and they just wanted to hang out with the stalkee. It was incredibly disturbing, and showed me just how lucky I was. I never really had an understanding of how much jeopardy I was in because everyone around me didn't think it was a big deal.
If you think you're being stalked
Document everything. Save every text, every screen shot of all the phone calls.
TELL SOMEONE. TELL THE POLICE. Do NOT keep it to yourself. You can't take any kind of legal action without proof.
Sometimes, even having a restraining order won't work. You need to save everything.